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I feel stupid for liking him
You know that feeling when you like someone to death but already liked another girl. And no matter how much he brokes your heart you still like him.That feeling sucks.And I feel stupid liking him.I feel stupid for liking a guy that doesn't like me back. I fell for a guy that flirts with every girl but yet I still like him.Why? I'm really stupid.
Okay so I've done another animated photo of me. It was taken on the same day as the one on my sidebar.But I decided to change to another one cause that one look so totally different from me.
I Photoshop the previous one and Gosh I look so Un-natural
So I did this with Just only effect.
Okay so My rants is about Bloggers .I'll just get straight to the point. I hate bloggers that always ask for follow back and stuff like that.Not Just one or two.Its like Majority of the bloggers are like that. People follow you when your blog is interesting or to their liking so they can get your recent updates. But it has became to a point where people use it for popularity. So what If you have more than 100 followers? Its just a Friggin number for god sake. Please Don't hate me, Im just expressing my opinion .And if you think Im being unreasonable feel free to comment :)
But, please don't feel offended.But hey, if the shoe fits, wear it! (I am going to receive so much hate for this)
Okay I know this is ridiculous so I woke up in the middle of the night and measured my temperature and i hit 39.1 degree. Being an obedient girl, I start eating again. Though I know this is a serious matter but I refuse to tell my parents about it. After much rest I measured again it decrease to 37.6.
I got fever so I can't update my blog very often now. I measured, Its 37.8 degree. Should I be concern?It will go away right? Im actually quite worried about my health. I haven't been eating for these few days. I skip breakfast and lunch.And when Im hungry I just eat biscuit ,The only "edible" food at home.Sometimes I skip dinner too.Okay.First of all. Im NOT on a diet. Anyway Im going to rest now Bye :)
My very first Gif photo
Hello Muffins, I did my very first Gif photo for the first time.I did quite badly on my first try though.But It was fun anws. So I decided to put it on my side bar hehs.
If you guys wonder how I did it you can leave a comment below, And I might consider doing a tutorial for it.Any questions you can ask me.Dun be shy. So heres the photo.
Anyway thanks to all the anon readers out there.
I was doing that through out. And ofcos I fell like alot of times which leaves a terrible looking patch
But i did enjoy though^^Thats all. bye
What if one day Blogger decide to close down?
This question had bug me for a longlong time. All of the blogger's effort are going to be wasted.
Well...Sometimes Internet Can't last forever. So you gotta be prepared for it.Its late now.Night
Okay, So my June holidays Haven't been really great.My mum sign me up in A skating and a badminton course . I wasn't excited about it but Instead I was quite hesitate about it. The first day of the badminton was TERRIBLE. All of My mates were some primary school boys like around 7-10 years old. Theres absolutely no girls. And my skills are even worse than theirs. I was screaming inside me . I Just stood there helplessly. I was sweating and was nearly breathless. It was a moment of fear. Im even being avoided by some 8 years old kid.
On Father's day , Was planning to buy my father a cake. Being unappreciated he complains about my acttitude and my personality. A father's gift is something you give with sincere. But yet he is demanding a gift . Few years back, When I was around 9 years old my sister and I had shared our money to buy a pretsent for him. I paid $5 of my shares. ($5 used to be quite alot to me when I was young) But In the end He only remembered that my sister paid for the gifts. Yes Its quite heart breakening to hear that from him but at his age his memory only gets worse so I can't really blame him for that.
Today, Thinking of doing something Nice for my parents. I tried baking a cake for them. I used part of my money to buy the Ingredients.But In the end it failed. But thats Okay I can try again another time. During dinner , I went outside to take out food for my dad. To save money , I didn't eat for dinner. I used the left over money to buy myself a bread in a vending machine which is much cheaper. When my mum came back home, She scolded me for leaving a mess and doubt me of bringing friends to my house . Her face looks even more fierce than usual. So I told her I was doing an experiment. I spend the whole afternoon trying to do something nice for them but it always turns out bad.
I hate how I was trying to do something nice for you and yet you are being so unappreciated. You didn't even say thanks when i gave you a gift.nvm.But everytime I gave you something,You would either lose it or spoil it.
Heavy Haze In Sg
HELLO, Headache here from the haze >< Went Jem In Jurong East with my friend, recently open derh.And the next thing i know i saw people covering their nose. PSI is 111 at 4pm, in the "unhealthy" range. The haze is so thick that I got headache.
You know what happens if it rains? Haze + rain = Acid rain.
Haze level is 117 now ._.
Have you ever had a friend who you love to death but at the same time you hate them and every once in a while you get an extremely strong urge to beat the shit out of them.
The day i met him :)
I'm the type of person who enjoys being alone. I like to walk home alone with my music. I like to stay home alone Friday nights. I just like quiet and time to myself. But I don't like being alone for a long time. I don't like to be alone long enough for the bad thoughts to take over. I guess what I'm saying is that I like being alone, but I hate being lonely.
Every girl is beautiful
Just because she doesn't have 100+ likes on her profile picture, doesn't mean she's not gorgeous. Every girl is beautiful, it's society that's ugly
Only if they knew
I act like everything is fine. I laugh at people's jokes, I do silly things with my friends and I act like I have a carefree life. It's funny though. When I come back home, I just turn off that mental switch. Then suddenly I break down. I feel alone, empty, tired, I can't exactly describe how I feel into words. Its like I have 2 different me's.One for the public, and one for myself. Only if they knew. Only if.
are you happy?
"are you happy?"is such a difficult question I always say yes, because i have friends I laugh at jokes, I go out a lot and have fun. My life isn't as bad as it could be, and i don't have terrible problems. I could be worse.
But then, one night at 3AM when I'm alone still awake, lying in bed, thinking about life I find myself crying my heart out Suddenly I convince that nobody likes me, or nobody will ever like me, I feel horrible and I question everything I had
and I don't know if I was ever happy at all.
In one point of my life , I doubt my existance
You may not agree with me but for my whole lifetime, ''true friend'' never exist in my dictionary
I don’t really forgive people I just pretend like it's okay and wait for my opportunity to destroy them.
You're never alone
Right now, there are people all over the world who are just like you. They're lonely. They're missing somebody. They're in love with someone they probably shouldn't be in love with. They have secrets you wouldn't believe. They wish, dream , hope, and they look out the window and they watch the people on the streets and wonder what they've been through, They wonder if there are people out there like them. They're like you and you could tell them everything and they would understand.You're never alone.
Just want to be alone
Do you ever get that feeling where you don't want to talk to anybody?You don't want to smile and you don't want to fake being happy. But at the same time you don't know exactly what's wrong either. There isn't a way to explain it to someone who doesn't understand. If you could want anything in the world it would to be alone. People have stopped being comforting and being alone never was. At least when you're alone no one will constanttly ask you what is wrong and there isn't anyone who won't take 'I don't know' for an answer. You hope the feeling will pass soon and that you will be able to be yourself again, but until then all you can do is wait.
I notice everything. And by everything, I literally mean everything. I notice when someone stops hitting me up like they used to. I notice when the way someone talks to me starts changing. I notice the little things that people do, and the little things they used to do. I notice when things change, and when it's no longer the same. I notice every single little detail. I just don't say anything
They don't have to say , you just know
Do you ever feel like someone doesn't want to be your friends with you anymore? They don't have to say anything, you just know. They talk to other people more than you, take hours to reply to your texts instead of minutes,
Constantly make plans with other people and hardly ask you to hang out. All along you know it isn't gonna end well but you still have that silver of hope. And that one day, they ignore you completely.And you know, you finally have to accept, you were right
Look back with no regrets
Do not hate because someone broke your heart, or your best friend betrayed you, the kid down the street called you fat, ugly,stupid, worthless. Do not concern yourself with things you cannot control. Cry when you need to , then let go when it's time. Don't hang onto painful memories just because you're afraid to forget. Let go of things that are in the past. Forget things that aren't worth remembering. Stop taking things for granted. Stop taking life for granted. Live for something. Live for yourself. Fall in love. Fall out of love. Fall in love. Fall out of love. Do this over and over until you know what it really is to love someone. Create. Imagine. Inspire. Share something wonderful. Live your life to its full potential. And one day, when you're old, look back with no regrets.
Have you ever read something that killed you inside?
Have you ever read something that killed you inside? Like a text message or someone's status. Everyone was going fine until you accidentally came across something you didn't want to read. Or found out something you were better off not knowing. It's almost as if it was posted just to purposely hurt you. But you constantly read it over and over again to torture yourself. It sucks how one little thing can ruin your whole day
The girl who everyone thought was happy
Have you ever laid in your bed and just cried? because you think you're ugly. Because you're not good enough for anyone. You've counted all your flaws from head to toe, making yourself feel worse. Cried because of all the comments that people blurt out, actually hurt? cried because your family is dysfunctional and never understands you. They tell you to stop complaining. That you have it so much better than kids in Africa, even though they don't understand your life either. You don't want to feel like an attention seeker, so you bottle everything up. around friends and family, you've created this lying smile and people believe it. But then at night time, when you're all alone in bed, the girl who everyone thought was always so happy, is crying her broken heart out
The Silence cry
The worst type of crying is the silent one. The one when everyone is asleep The one where you feel it in your throat and your eyes become blurry from the tears. The one where you just want to scream. The one where you have to hold your breath and grab your stomach to keep quiet. The one where you can't breath anymore. The one when you realize the person that meant the most to you, is gone.
A Trip To Chinatown
So Today My friends and i went Chinatown to do project. After project Raewen and me Go Vivo city. And we went to ToyRUs . And yes we acted like a total retards in there. We start fighting each other with this long noodle spongy thing. It was really fun ;)
Breaking down but can't
Feel like breaking down but you can't. You're afraid people will say you're weak. You're afraid others will take the chance to strike on you. Your best friend don't understand you anymore. You see the people you love slowly leaving you. You have nobody to talk to, nobody trustable, real. Your family members don't understand you. You're scared to trust people. You feel ugly, useless and unwanted. You're treated as an option to everybody. You're nothing to the person who mean the world to you.
Do you know how it feels to have most of your friends using you? They come to you as and when they like and you can do nothing cause they mean so much to you? Do you know how it felt when everyone just blamed you for something even though it's not your fault? Do you know how painful is it when you realize there isn't a single person who you can turn to for help? Everyone just leaves you one day. People telling you they'll always be there for you but they aren't. One mistake everyone leaves you, but no matter a hundred or a thousand mistakes they do you won't leave them because they mean to much to you. And no matter how much you meant your sorry, they wont forgive you. Then, people you are once so close with hates you so much, they start becoming so sarcastic. Their words are filled with sarcasm that it hurts you so badly and you can't do anything. You want to cry, scream and shout but you can't. You just have to keep it to yourself and say "I'm alright." with a smile on your face and pretend everything's alright.
Now do you feel me?
To this day, I've never felt insecure.Ever.But i looked in the mirror and noticed that I gained a few pounds.Why?One, because I was growing, two, because i was stupid enough to sit there on the coach for a week and eat junk food. Then I noticed that I had split ends in my hair and my hair was dying.Why? Because I applied too much heat these past few months and my hair was beginning to weaken. I also noticed that my skin looked a little more oily than usual and my cheekbones weren't very prominent. My upper lip curled under when i smiled.
Then it hit me.Those three pounds i gained, meant nothing. There is a girl out there somewhere who gained one pound and threw up her dinner to lose it. The split ends i had, meant nothing. There is a girl my age who has cancer, and doesn't have hair, who would probably love to worry about split ends again. My cheekbones?Meant nothing. My oily skin?There are people out there with damaged skin from burns they received in their life, so my oily skins meant nothing. My upper lip doesn't matter either because there are babies that are born with problems with their mouths and they haven't developed properly.
Everything I've listed above don't matter. My insecurities have minimal importance to what some people have to deal with everyday. It really makes me reevaluate my life and my choices. Looking good might mean the world to some people, but at the moment, my stupid little worries mean nothing compared to other people's worries.
The people in this world have to learn that your problem might be small next to others'I just hope everyone becomes smart enough to understand that and accept that concept before it's too late
I'll write whatever I want , go ahead and judge me however you like BUT negative comments will not be tolerated :)